In the complex landscape of psychological manipulation, few terms have been as misunderstood and misused as "gaslighting." Despite its frequent appearance in casual conversations and social media, the true depth of this psychological tactic remains largely unexplored. This week, we had the privilege of sitting down with Dr. Paul Phillips, a renowned expert who sheds critical light on the insidious nature of gaslighting—a form of emotional abuse that goes far beyond mere disagreement or misunderstanding. Dr. Phillips helps us unravel why the deliberate distortion of reality by a perpetrator can be so profoundly damaging to a victim's sense of self and perception of truth.
By Dr. Paul Phillips - Need a Psych
Having had a series of conversations over the last fortnight it came to my attention that people seem to be unaware of what gaslighting really is.
So firstly, gaslighting is the verb that comes from gaslight ... the movie. so there is a single source of truth and fact here (the irony of this will become apparent).
In the movie the perpetrator changes facts and denies those changes so that the victim is forced to question her grip on reality.
So gaslighting someone is the action of adding facts that do not exist, or denying facts that do exist, and the result is that the target starts to question their own grip on reality as their sense of reality does not match the "new facts" as they are now being stated. as the sense of self is grounded in a sense of facts (i.e., i own this, i live at this address, i have this education, i a in a relationship with this person, etc.) and those facts are altered the sense of self becomes unstable.
The irony here is when people say there are many definitions of gaslighting, they are denying the fact of the movie as the single source of truth and creating other facts, i.e., they are gaslighting you about gaslighting.
This is similar to the Rashomon effect, also named after a single source of truth, the movie Rashomon. the difference is the Rashomon effect is about interpretation of the same facts being different between people, not the false addition or deletion of the facts themselves.
When a person is subjected to gaslighting they can end up with a destabalised ego (Anna Freud ego theory not Sigmund's), if it continues the ego may become weakened, and the barrier that protects it hyperpermeable. the result is the person looks incredibly mentally ill, having extreme symptoms and symptoms of multiple illnesses yet is not actually necessarily mentally ill.
You can see similar results from sleep deprivation.
In plain english, because of the change of facts, the person looses a stable sense of self and the outside world (destabalised ego), if it continues their coping mechanisms cease to work, they feel "not themself" (ego dystonic behaviours/thoughts) look like they have mental illness/es (psychotic episode, major depressive disorder, social anxiety disorder, ptsd) that they do not actually have (weakened ego) and take on feedback from others without filtering it properly (hyperpermable ego).
This can happen to ANYONE. no one is immune to this. it has NOTHING to do with resilience. it bypasses defenses and coping strategies.
This is a specific behaviour that may be seen as "bullying" or "grooming".
This may happen in many areas of life. Can you think of one?
About Dr. Paul Phillips
B.A. (H.M.S.), B.App.Sc. (Occ. Th.), B.A. (Psych.), M.H.Sc. (Beh.Sc.), PhD
Dr. Paul has obtained multiple health related degrees and certificates. This includes a Bachelor of Arts in Human Movement Studies from the University of Technology Sydney, a Bachelor of Arts with a major in Psychology from the University of Western Sydney, a Bachelor of Applied Science in Occupational Therapy from the University of Sydney, a Masters in Health Science majoring in Behavioural Science and a Philosophical Doctorate from the University of Sydney from the school of Behavioural Science.
He is a registered Occupational Therapist and Psychologist with the Australian Health Professionals Registration Agency.
Dr. Paul has been published in journals and conference proceedings more than 49 times including the World Federation of Occupational Therapists, International Mental Health Conference, Law Society of NSW Journal, The Australian and New Zealand Psychiatry, Psychology and Law, and the International Congress of Applied Psychology. He has presented at the Law Society of NSW on psychological issues.
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